


The Pinnacle

by inkandpaperqwerty



Series: The Best of Kansas [8]
Category: Criminal Minds (US TV), Supernatural
Genre: Big Brother Dean Winchester, Big Brother Sam Winchester, Caring Dean Winchester, Caring Sam Winchester, Drug Addiction, Drug Withdrawals, Family, Family Feels, Fluff and Angst, Friendship, Gen, Hurt Spencer Reid, Hurt/Comfort, Monster Hunter Spencer Reid, Overdose, Parental Bobby Singer
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-01
Updated: 2020-08-01
Packaged: 2021-03-05 20:14:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,687
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25651195
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/inkandpaperqwerty/pseuds/inkandpaperqwerty
Summary: Spencer calls Sam in the middle of the night, needing help. Sam wakes up Dean and the two hit the road, ready to do everything they can to help their brother. Spencer just has to be willing to accept it.
Relationships: Spencer Reid & Bobby Singer, Spencer Reid & Dean Winchester & Sam Winchester
Series: The Best of Kansas [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1025268
Comments: 47
Kudos: 229





	The Pinnacle

“Sam?”

Sam blinked in the darkness, vaguely aware of the phone he was holding to his head.

“Sam, are you there?”

It took a second for Sam’s still-sleeping mind to realize it was Spencer on the other end, but once that connection was made, he quickly realized Spencer sounded upset.

“Uh, yeah.” Sam rubbed his eyes. “Yeah, I’m here. What’s up?”

“I screwed up, Sam.” Spencer took a shuddering breath, his voice thick with tears. “I screwed up so bad.”

Sam’s heart started to beat a little faster, and he sat up in bed with a quiet, “Spencer, what happened?”

“I was—” Spencer swallowed hard. “I was having a really bad week, and I know—I know I shouldn’t have, but I started looking—looking for Dilaudid, and I couldn’t find any, and—and heroin is similar, and—”

“Spencer.” Sam cut off the rambling as gently as he could. “Tell me what happened.”

“I overdosed.” Spencer choked out the words. “I thought I calculated the right amount, but I—I was wrong. The guy I bought from dialed 911 before he bailed, but I was—I was dead when they found me. They got me back, but—Sam, I screwed up so bad.”

Sam pushed his blankets off and got to his feet, making his way out into the hall. “It’s okay, Spencer. Everything’s gonna be okay.” He opened the door to Dean’s room and stepped inside. “Did you talk to someone?”

“Yeah,” Spencer replied shakily. “Someone came to talk to me as soon as I woke up.”

“Okay, and what did they say?” Sam reached out and grabbed Dean’s shoulder, giving him a shake.

“They told me I’m lucky to be alive.” Spencer scoffed. “They have to give me another dose of Naloxone, but after that has a chance to settle, I can be released.”

“Okay, hold on a second.” Sam gave Dean another shake. “Dean.”

Dean startled and looked up at Sam with a slurred, “Huh?”

“Spencer needs us. Get up.” Sam left the explanation at that and headed back to his room, putting his attention back on Spencer. “Where are you?”

“I’m staying at the Super 8 in Columbus, Nebraska.”

“Okay.” Sam wedged the phone between his head and shoulder, dropping his sweatpants and grabbing a pair of jeans from the floor. “I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I want you to summon Xal.”

Spencer snorted out a bitter laugh. “I don’t really want Xal to see me like this. I know he’s bound to me and all, but I don’t want to give him any weaknesses to exploit.”

Sam zipped his fly. “Again, I can’t believe I’m saying this, but summon him anyway. If he were going to use you, he would have done it by now.”

Spencer didn’t say anything for a moment, but he eventually answered with a quiet, “Okay.”

“Tell Xal where you’re staying, and have him go get your car.”

“Okay.” Spencer didn’t say anything for a moment. “Sam, I…”

Sam waited for a few seconds, but Spencer didn’t finish. “You…?” he pressed.

Spencer sighed softly. “I’m sorry. About all of this, I’m just… I’m sorry.”

Sam pressed his lips together in a thin line. “Spencer, don’t be sorry.” He shook his head. “You’re just going through a rough time. Dean and I are happy to help.”

“I should be better than this.” Spencer didn’t even hesitate. “I shouldn’t rely on drugs to feel better.”

“Spence, you made a mistake. It happens. It’s okay.” Sam opened a dresser drawer and grabbed a shirt, tossing it onto the bed. “Just focus on getting better.”

Spencer didn’t say anything right away. “I’ll summon Xal as soon as I hang up.”

“Good.” Sam’s gut instinct still said trusting the demon was a bad move, but as far as Sam was concerned, Xal had proven himself more than once. A small amount of trust wasn’t a terrible idea. “Dean and I are gonna leave as soon as we’re dressed. We’ll be there in no time. What room are you in?”

“211.”

“Okay.” Sam wet his lips. “Are you gonna be alright if I hang up?”

“Yeah.” Spencer inhaled like he was going to say something, stopped, and then spoke. “Yeah, I’ll be alright.”

“Okay. We’re on our way.”

Sam pulled the phone away from his ear and hung up, tossing the device onto his bed. He grabbed the hem of his shirt and pulled it up over his head, throwing it aside and grabbing the clean shirt from his bed.

“What’s up with Poindexter?”

Sam looked toward his bedroom door and saw Dean standing there, dressed and ready to go. “He overdosed on heroin. He’s alright, but he’s pretty freaked out, and I think he could use some friends.”

Dean nodded without hesitation. “Let’s get going then.”

Sam opened the top drawer of his dresser and grabbed a flannel shirt. “You got it. Let’s go.”

Dean turned away and disappeared down the hall. Sam put on his flannel shirt and grabbed his phone from the bed, following Dean out into the hall.

_Don’t worry, Spencer. We’re on our way._

* * *

“You said 211, right?”

Sam answered Dean’s question by knocking on the door. There was a moment of silence, and then footsteps came from the other side. The door swung inward, and Xal stood there with a grim expression on his face.

“Come on in,” Xal said, stepping aside to let them pass.

Sam and Dean both walked in and saw Spencer lying in bed, still wearing the hospital scrubs. Sam offered a small smile and walked over, sitting down on the edge of the bed.

“How are you feeling?”

Spencer slowly sat up and shrugged his shoulders. He looked down at his trembling arms, which were covered in tape residue from the IVs. “Um, I’m having withdrawal symptoms, but I think I’m alright.”

“What kind of symptoms?”

Spencer shrugged again, his eyes perpetually downcast. “Shakes… My stomach hurts… I’m running a fever…” He rubbed his arms and heaved a sigh. “I’m really not feeling so hot.”

“I can imagine,” Sam said. “Have you tried to drink some ginger ale for your stomach?”

Spencer nodded wearily. “Yeah… at the hospital they gave me some ginger ale… I think it helped? I couldn’t really tell.”

Dean pointed toward the door to the motel room. “I can go get some. I’m sure there’s a convenience store somewhere around here.”

Xal jerked a thumb over his shoulder. “There’s a Walgreens up the road.”

“Perfect.” Dean started walking backwards towards the door. “Anything else I should get?”

“Maybe some soup?” Sam offered, looking at Dean. “Something easy on the stomach.”

Dean gave a thumbs up and opened the door. “Got it. I’ll be back soon.”

“Drive safe,” Sam said.

Spencer lifted his hand and gave a weak little wave.

Dean waved back and then left the motel room behind.

Sam looked over his shoulder at Xal. “You can leave now, if you want.”

Xal folded his arms over his chest and shook his head, brown hair falling into his blue eyes. “Nah. I think I’ll stick around until Spencer’s feeling better.”

Briefly, Sam wondered what Xal’s motive for sticking around would be, but he ultimately decided it didn’t matter. Xal didn’t pose any threat as he was, and Spencer needed Sam’s complete and undivided attention.

“What can I help with?” Sam asked, worried eyes wandering over Spencer’s shaking frame. “Are you cold?”

Spencer nodded, but he made no attempt to get further under the blankets. “I think it’s the fever,” he mumbled. “At the hospital, they were giving me something for the withdrawal symptoms, but… I didn’t want to stay there.”

“Okay.” Sam wet his lips. “Can I… ask why?”

Spencer thought about it for a moment, and then he shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know. I don’t really like hospitals, and…” He sighed. “I didn’t want to be reminded of what I did.”

Sam wasn’t sure how that worked. Wouldn’t the withdrawal symptoms also remind Spencer of what he did? But Sam chose not to question it. Spencer was already having a rough time. He didn’t need to be interrogated.

Sam cleared his throat. “Are you having aches and pains like you did last time?”

Spencer nodded his head a few times, and then he reached up and rubbed his neck.

“Should I run a hot shower for you?” Sam got to his feet, pretty sure he already knew the answer.

“Yes, please.” Spencer reached up and tucked a stray strand of hair behind his ear.

Sam nodded his head and went into the bathroom. He turned the water on and made it as hot as it would go.

“Anything I can do to help?”

Sam turned around and saw Xal standing in the doorway to the bathroom. “Uh… not really. It’s just a matter of turning the water on.”

Xal pressed his lips into a thin line and nodded his head. “Got it.”

Sam looked at Xal for a long moment, and then he asked, “Why do you care about Spencer?”

Xal ran a hand through his hair and let out a brief sigh. “You’ve seen it happen.” He shoved both hands into his pockets. “When Spencer made his deal with me, he created a clause that says if I’m in a situation I want to be out of, his tattoo hurts until he summons me.” He shrugged his shoulders. “I care because he cares. I care because I don’t have a lot of allies, and Spencer is good people.”

Sam felt a small smile pulling at the corner of his mouth. “Yeah, he is.” His smile disappeared. “I think it goes without saying that if you ever hurt him—”

“You’ll hunt me down and destroy me?” Xal arched a brow. “Yeah, that goes without saying.” He shrugged his shoulders. “But just for the record, I wouldn’t hurt Spencer. Like I said, I don’t have a lot of allies. Spencer actually gives a crap whether or not I’m okay, and I like that.”

Sam nodded a few times, and while it was weird to hear a demon admitting fondness for anyone, Sam didn’t find it completely unbelievable.

Still mulling over the conversation, Sam turned his attention to the shower and tried to get the water to come out of the showerhead instead of the spigot. It took a little bit, but he managed to get it flowing, and then Xal called Spencer over.

“Is it hot?” Spencer asked, stepping into the bathroom and slowly pulling his scrubs up over his head.

“Scalding,” Sam assured. “Do you need any help getting in?”

Spencer shook his head and dropped his scrub top to the floor. “No, it’s okay… I’ll be fine.”

“Alright. We’ll be waiting in the room.” Sam smiled at Spencer and then left, giving Xal a slight push to get him out of the bathroom. Sam shut the door behind him.

Xal sat on the chair that was next to a desk in the corner of the room, and Sam sat back down on the bed. Silence settled over the room, Xal doing something with his phone while Sam watched the closed bathroom door.

“What are you doing?” Sam finally asked, not looking away from the bathroom.

“Texting,” was Xal’s simple answer.

“Who are you texting?” Sam looked at Xal, immediately suspicious.

Xal looked up from his phone and stared at Sam for a long while, a contemplative expression on his face.

“What?” Sam snapped.

“Just thinking. You’re not the only one with a reason to be distrustful.” Xal looked down at his phone for a moment, and then he looked back at Sam. “I’m texting my sister.”

“Your sister?” Sam echoed dumbly, surprised by the answer and wondering if it was true.

“Technically, my vessel’s sister.” Xal gave Sam a hard look. “I’m only telling you this because Spencer trusts you, and because I don’t think you’d ever hurt humans.” He sat up a little straighter in his chair and put his phone on the desk next to him. “I have an older sister, a younger sister, and a younger brother.”

Sam blinked in surprise. “You keep in touch with all of them?”

Xal nodded. “Yup.” He made a popping noise at the end of the word. “I keep in touch with my mom and dad, too.”

Sam looked at Xal for a long moment, utterly awash with confusion, and he slowly shook his head. “I don’t understand. Why?”

Xal shrugged his shoulders. “Loneliness, I guess. I do my best to stay out of trouble, because if I don’t cause trouble, I don’t get sent back to Hell. Of course, that means no contact with other demons and monsters, so…” He shrugged again. “I text Lyssa instead.”

Sam mulled over the information for a few seconds, and then he started to nod his head. “I guess I can see that.” He paused. “Do they know?”

Xal shook his head. “Nah. Adam Stallworth was in a bad car accident. He was on life support for four days, but he was never gonna wake up, so they took him off. That’s when I took over, the doctors called it a miracle, and everybody went home happy.”

Sam frowned. “But you’re lying to them.”

“So?” Xal arched a brow, clearly not seeing the problem with his behavior. “Whatever is different about me is attributed to the car accident, and they get to have their family member back. What’s so bad about that?”

Sam didn’t respond right away, and when he did reply, he found he was reluctantly agreeing. “I guess it’s not that bad…” He thought about it for a moment more. “What are you texting her about?”

“I just told her a friend is withdrawing from opioids. I didn’t give her any details.” Xal picked up his phone and moved like he was going to toss it to Sam. “You want to take a look?”

Sam shook his head. “No, that’s okay.” Despite himself, he found he believed what Xal was telling him.

Xal leaned back in his chair and put his phone back down. “I’ve got nothing to hide.”

“Surprisingly, I believe you.” Sam looked at the bathroom door and then looked back at Xal. “Can you decrease Spencer’s symptoms at all?”

Xal shook his head. “Healing isn’t exactly a demonic trait.”

Sam nodded his head with a soft sigh. “Yeah, I thought so. Figured it was worth a shot.”

Xal opened his mouth to respond, but he was interrupted by Spencer calling out from the bathroom.

“Sam?”

Sam got to his feet and walked over to the bathroom door, raising his voice to be heard above the shower. “Yeah?”

“Could you get me some clothes from my bag?” Spencer called back. “I forgot.”

“Sure.” Sam stepped away from the bathroom door and quickly found Spencer’s duffel bag on the floor by the bed.

Sam crouched down and unzipped the bag, digging around inside until he found briefs, socks, jeans, a long-sleeved, light purple shirt, and a dark brown sweater vest. He stood up and carried the clothes over to the bathroom, letting himself in.

“Here,” he said, putting the clothes on the floor by the toilet. “Need anything else?”

“No,” Spencer replied, sticking his head out around the curtain. “If you want, there are some cards in my bag. You and Xal could play.”

Sam nodded. “Sure.” He left the bathroom and shut the door behind him, looking at Xal. “Do you want to play some cards?”

Xal pursed his lips and shrugged his shoulders. “Why not?”

“Cool.” Sam walked over to Spencer’s duffel and began to dig through the contents again. “You know how to play Gin?”

“Yup.”

Sam found the cards and pulled the deck from the bag. “Got’em.” He sat down on the bed and pulled the cards from their box, quickly shuffling the deck.

Xal picked up his phone and began texting again.

Sam shuffled the deck again and then started to deal the cards, vaguely aware of the fact that he shouldn’t have been so comfortable with a demon. Had he learned nothing from Ruby?

“Want to see a picture of my baby sister?”

Sam dealt the last few cards and looked up. He contemplated the offer and then nodded. “Yeah, sure.”

Xal grabbed his cards from the bedspread and turned his phone around, holding it out so Sam could see.

There, on the screen, was a small child about two years of age. She was dressed in a little pink dress and had a flower in her dark brown hair. She was smiling at the picture-taker with a big, gap-toothed smile, her cheeks dappled with freckles.

Sam couldn’t help but smile. “She’s adorable.”

“Her name is Olivia. We call her Livie.” Xal smiled fondly, locking his phone screen and setting the device aside. “She’ll be three next month.”

Sam picked up his cards and looked them over, and he couldn’t help but feel a little bit curious. “You, uh… you want to tell me more about your family?”

Xal shrugged, sitting down on the mattress and discarding a card. “Sure.”

Sam drew a card and scanned his hand, waiting to hear more.

“Alyssa is the oldest; she’s twenty-three.” Xal contemplated his cards as he spoke. “Then there’s my vessel, Adam, who just turned twenty.”

Sam discarded, and Xal picked it up before discarding one of his own.

“My little brother, Jonah, is thirteen, and then there’s little Livie. She was a surprise.”

Sam drew another card and looked it over. “Are they a pretty close family?”

“Very.” Xal tapped the backs of his cards. “Between texting and Instagram and Snapchat, we’re pretty much always in touch.”

Sam discarded and looked at Xal, suspicion alight in his eyes. “And you like that?”

Xal only smiled, picking a card from the top of the pile. “Yeah, I do.” He discarded a three of diamonds. “It gives me someone to talk to, and they make it easy to stay out of trouble.”

Sam hummed and picked up a card, rearranging his hand before discarding. “And if you stay out of trouble, you stay out of Hell, right?”

Xal nodded and picked up a card. “You got it.” He pursed his lips and contemplated his hand for a moment, and then he discarded. “Hunters can’t track demonic activity if there’s no demonic activity to track.”

“Smart.” Sam picked up a card. He was silent for a moment, his fingers running idly over the cards in his hand. “You, uh… you’re not so bad, as far as demons go.”

Xal snorted. “Gee, thanks.”

Sam glared slightly. “Hey, you’re not getting more than that from me.”

Xal smirked. “I figured as much.”

Sam discarded and gave Xal a hard look. “I haven’t exactly had a good history with demons.”

“That’s slightly racist.” Xal picked up a card and looked at it. “But I don’t blame you. I wouldn’t trust demons, either.” He discarded. “We’re kinda evil and all that.”

“Yeah, kinda.” Sam drew a card, and then tilted his head curiously. “Does Spencer have an Instagram?”

Xal smirked and nodded. “Yeah, I talked him into Instagram and Snapchat. It took some doing, but I convinced him it was a good idea.”

Sam pursed his lips and discarded. “Huh. Maybe I’ll get one, too.”

“Don’t use your real name.” Xal laughed to himself, drawing. “I think the FBI would find you pretty quick.”

Sam couldn’t help but laugh a little at that. “Yeah, maybe it’s not a good idea.”

“Gin!” Xal put his hand down so Sam could see his cards.

Sam opened up his mouth to respond but stopped short when he heard a thudding sound come from the bathroom. He jumped to his feet and went to the bathroom door, knocking a few times. “Spencer? Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” Spencer called from inside. “I just got dizzy for a moment there. I, uh… I think I’m gonna get out soon.”

“Okay.” Sam ran a hand through his hair. “Do you want some help getting dressed?”

“No,” Spencer replied, sounding tired but certain. “I’m alright.”

“Okay.” Sam sighed to himself and then walked over to the bed. “He says he’s alright.”

“Do we believe him?” Xal asked, shuffling the deck of cards.

“I don’t know,” Sam admitted reluctantly. “I think he’s okay to get dressed, but other than that…”

Xal nodded understandingly. “Yeah.” He started to deal the cards. “Do you know why he used in the first place?”

“No.” Sam sat down on the bed and picked up the cards as they were dealt to him. “I figured I would ask if I could get him alone.”

“I can leave whenever,” Xal offered, dealing the last card and setting the deck down. “I just wanted to make sure he was alright.”

Sam discarded and surprised himself by saying, “I think you should stay.” He immediately felt the need to explain himself. “Spencer needs all the support he can get. Especially since his old team isn’t here.”

Xal drew a card and ran a hand through his reddish brown locks. “Did you tell Bobby?” he asked, discarding.

Sam drew a card. “Yup. Called him on the way here.” He looked over his hand and, after a moment of indecision, discarded.

Xal grabbed a card from the top of the pile. “Did you tell Garcia?” He discarded a six of spades.

“Oh!” Sam snapped his fingers. “I forgot.” He stood up and pulled his phone from his pocket. “I better do it before he gets out. He’ll tell me not to call her.”

Xal nodded and made the universal sign for zipping lips.

Sam went into his contacts and scrolled until he got to The Black Queen. He pressed the green telephone icon and then put the device to his ear. He walked over to the bathroom door and listened to the shower running while the phone rang.

“You’ve reached the Office of Omnipotence; how may I blow your mind today?”

“Garcia, it’s Sam.” Sam spoke in a hurried, somewhat hushed voice. “I have to be quick because, knowing Spencer, he doesn’t want to make a big deal of things.” Sam took a breath. “Spencer overdosed on heroin.”

“He _what?_ ”

“He’s okay, don’t worry,” Sam rushed. “He’s going through some withdrawal symptoms, but he’s out of the hospital now, and we’re with him. I just wanted you to be kept in the loop.”

“He’s—hospital?” Garcia’s voice was tight. “He’s—he’s okay? Are you sure he’s okay?”

“Yeah,” Sam assured, nodding his head. “He’s taking a hot shower right now. But he got medications at the hospital, so he’s alright. He just—” Sam stopped when he heard the shower turn off, and he lowered his voice before continuing. “He just needs rest and support. Maybe send him a well-timed, cheerful text?”

“Yeah, I can do that.” Garcia still sounded worried. “I can totally do that.”

Sam could picture Garcia nodding eagerly on her end.

“And you’ll send me text updates on how he’s doing, right?” she asked.

“Of course,” Sam assured. “I’ll keep you posted.”

Garcia took a deep breath. “Okay.” She exhaled. “Okay, I’ll be waiting to hear from you.”

“Sure thing,” Sam said. “Bye Garcia.”

“Bye Sam.”

Sam pulled the phone away from his ear and snapped it shut. He shoved the phone in his pocket and sat back down on the bed, picking up his hand and looking through his cards. “Whose turn is it?”

“Yours.”

Sam drew a card and looked over his hand, discarding his seven of hearts. “Cool.”

Xal drew a card from the pile and looked over his hand with a quiet hum. “Think Dean’ll be back soon?” He discarded.

“Hopefully.” Sam drew a card and debated what to get rid of for a moment. He had a pretty good hand. “I was thinking, if Spencer feels up to it, we could head to Bobby’s.”

“I could drive his Mustang,” Xal offered.

Sam opened his mouth to agree when Spencer opened the bathroom door and stepped out.

“How are you feeling?” Sam asked, finally discarding.

“Pretty crappy, but I think the shower helped.” Spencer stood in the doorway to the bathroom with a towel over his head, his hair still dripping wet. “Is Dean back yet?”

Xal shook his head while Sam actually answered with a, “No.”

Spencer nodded his head. “Got it.” He chewed on his lip, one hand coming up to rub his stomach. “He’ll be back soon, right?”

Sam nodded. “Yeah, he should be back any minute.”

Spencer nodded again, chewing on his lip a little more. “Got it.” He heaved a sigh and adjusted his sweater vest. “What are you guys playing?”

“Gin,” Xal answered, discarding a five of spades. “You wanna play with us?”

Spencer shook his head and indicated the bed with a gesture. “Really, all I feel like doing is lying down.”

Sam immediately stood up and stepped away from the bed. “We can play cards later.”

Xal grabbed the deck of cards and the discard pile. “Yeah, here you go.”

Spencer shuffled over to the bed and pulled the covers back, flopping in and pulling his legs up toward himself. “You guys can sit on the end of the bed and keep playing.”

Sam opened his mouth to respond. “Well—”

The door to the motel room opened up and Dean stepped in with a bottle of ginger ale in his outstretched hand. “I’ve got ginger ale!”

Spencer reached out a hand and made a grabbing motion. “Dean, you’re the best.”

Dean shut the door behind him and handed the bottle over, holding up a plastic shopping bag. “I also got you some Ritz crackers to snack on.”

Spencer smiled. “Thanks, Dean.”

Dean gave Spencer a thumbs up and then pointed to Xal with a glare. “What are you still doing here?”

Xal shuffled the cards in his hands. “Sam said about going to Bobby’s. I was gonna drive the Mustang while you take Spencer in the Impala.”

Spencer took a long swig of ginger ale. “You don’t think Bobby will mind?”

“Of course not.” Dean put the crackers down on the bed. “Taking you to Bobby’s is just taking you where you belong. With family.”

Spencer ducked his head, smiling to himself. “If you say so.” He took another drink of ginger ale. “Xal, are you sure you don’t mind the drive?”

“I love driving the Mustang.” Xal continued shuffling the cards in his hands. “It’s no trouble.”

Spencer pushed the blankets off and leaned over the edge of the bed, grabbing his shoes from the floor. “I can be ready in a couple minutes.” He untied his first shoe, wrestling it onto his foot.

Sam handed his cards over to Xal and then walked over to Spencer’s duffle bag. He zipped it up and slung it over one shoulder. “Let’s hit the road then.”

“I’ve got some pillows and a blanket in my car.” Spencer slipped his second shoe on, leaving both shoes untied, and he got to his feet. “I use them when I sleep in the Mustang.”

“You should always get a motel,” Dean advised. “The quality sleep is worth it.”

Spencer gave Dean a sheepish sort of look and shrugged. “I sleep fine. There are just some hunts where I don’t want my name on any records. Not even my fake name.”

Dean gave Spencer a disapproving look, but Sam saw the logic.

“Dean… he’s got a point.”

“He’s got nothing,” Dean snapped, giving Spencer a disapproving look. “He shouldn’t be sleeping rough.”

Spencer shrugged his shoulders. “It’s not a big deal, Dean. Besides, me having pillows and a blanket in my car is working out well for me right now.”

Dean still didn’t seem pleased, but he didn’t say anything more about it. He just jerked a thumb over his shoulder and grabbed the door to the room. “Let’s go.”

Spencer shuffled out of the motel room, Sam on his heels and Xal trailing behind.

Sam felt his phone go off, and he quickly pulled it from his pocket.

**Garcia** _Are you sure he’s okay?_

Sam smiled to himself and began texting back.

**Reply** _He’s okay. We’re taking him to Bobby’s._

Sam shoved his phone back in his pocket and followed Spencer and Dean out of the motel.

_He’ll be alright with us._

Of that, Sam was certain.

* * *

“So.” Spencer swallowed hard and tried to calm his racing heart. He had been thinking about asking ever since they left the motel in Columbus, but he couldn’t quite quell the thoughts that insisted he was being a burden. Even though Bobby had gone to the kitchen for a drink, and even though Sam and Spencer were alone, he was still on edge about the whole thing.

Sam, who was sitting on the end of Bobby’s couch with Spencer’s feet in his lap, looked at Spencer and slowly arched a brow. “So…?” he pressed.

Spencer wet his lips and looked down at his lap, fingers curling through the blanket wrapped around his legs. “I, uh…” He shook his head, unable to determine whether his hands were shaking because of the withdrawals or his nervousness. “I was just wondering… when, uh, when you and Dean go back to the Bunker, maybe… um, maybe I could come with you?”

Sam seemed a little surprised by the request, but he almost immediately smiled and nodded his head. “That would be great, Spence.”

Spencer felt a little pang in his chest at the nickname, reminded of the family he had left behind. “I… I just think it would be easier to fight the cravings if I wasn’t alone.” He rubbed the back of his head. “I mean, I know I have Xal, but…”

Sam gave Spencer a kind smile and shook his head. “Spence, you don’t have to explain yourself. Dean and I would love to have you stay with us.”

Spencer looked at Sam, still struggling to calm his nerves. “You would?”

“Of course we would.” Sam kept smiling. “You’re our friend, Spencer.”

Spencer looked down, a bitter note entering his voice. “You’re not the first person to call me a friend.”

Sam frowned slightly, a curious tone coloring his voice. “Do you really think if your old team knew you were struggling they would turn you away?”

Spencer thought about it for a moment, and then he heaved a sigh. “I don’t know.” He shook his head, drawing his knees up toward his chest. He folded his shaking arms atop his knees, struggling to keep still. “No, I guess they wouldn’t.”

Sam didn’t say anything for a moment, and then he nudged Spencer’s leg to get his attention. “Tell me about your team,” he said. “I’ve only ever met Morgan, Hotch, and Penelope.”

Spencer looked at Sam for a long moment, his stomach twisting at the thought of his old team. “Are you sure you want to hear about them?”

Sam nodded his head, smiling. “Absolutely.”

Spencer chewed on his lip for a moment, and then he let himself think about his friends. “Well, there’s JJ. She’s like the team mom, and she takes care of everyone.” He leaned back and stretched out his legs, depositing his feet in Sam’s lap. “Before you guys, she was the only person in the world who called me Spence.”

Sam adjusted the blanket and tucked it around Spencer’s feet. “It sounds like you guys were pretty close.”

Spencer shrugged his shoulders. “Yeah, we were. Her sons are my godsons.” He slouched a bit and rubbed at his aching stomach. “I guess I’ve been failing them lately. I haven’t been to see them in a while…”

Sam pressed his lips together and didn’t say anything right away, a thoughtful expression crossing his face. “You needed a break. There’s nothing wrong with that.”

 _Yes, there is._ But Spencer didn’t say that out loud. He knew that Sam would argue, and Spencer didn’t want a fight. He just wanted to feel better.

“So,” Sam started, urging Spencer along. “JJ is like the team mom. Who else is there?”

“Um, there’s Rossi.” Spencer reached up and tucked a strand of hair behind his ear. “He’s—”

“Wait, Rossi? As in… _David_ Rossi?” Sam asked, his eyes wide.

Spencer nodded his head. “Yeah, like the author of the books?”

“Dude, that’s awesome!” Sam exclaimed. “I’ve read all of his books. They’re some of my favorite.”

Spencer smiled and nodded his head a few times. “Yeah, I’ve read them, too. He was kinda like… the team uncle, I guess.” Spencer rubbed his wrists, his forearms still trembling. “He was the team dad when Hotch wasn’t around, but he was also the guy who let you do things Hotch probably wouldn’t.”

Sam laughed. “He sounds like someone who knows how to have a good time.”

“Oh, he is.” Spencer smiled again. “There’s only one more position on the team to fill, but it got filled by various people while I worked there. Emily Prentiss was the one who was there the longest, and she was like a sister to me. We were close.” He looked down at his lap. “We were all close.”

Sam offered a small smile. “It sounds like your team had something really special.”

Spencer smiled, but there were tears in his eyes. “We did.”

Sam didn’t say anything for a moment, and when he did speak, his voice was soft and understanding. “Is that why you used, Spence?”

Spencer reached up to cover his face, unable to stop a choked sob from making its way up his throat. “I don’t know.” He shook his head, sobbing once more before gulping down a breath. “I don’t know. I just couldn’t stop thinking about how things used to be.”

Sam slowly stood up and knelt down beside the couch, pulling Spencer into a hug. “Hey, take it easy.”

Spencer hesitated, but then he returned the hug, burying his face in Sam’s shoulder. “It’s never going to be the same.”

“I know. I know, and it sucks.” Sam rubbed Spencer’s back a few times and then put some space between them, holding Spencer at arm’s length. “It sucks, but you don’t have to be alone.”

Spencer took a deep breath and nodded his head, reaching up to tuck his hair behind his ear. “I know. You and Dean and Bobby have been great.”

Sam pulled Spencer in and hugged him again. “We’re here for you, Spence.” He pulled back again, taking Spencer by the shoulders and giving him an encouraging smile. “Maybe we can call Garcia and have her come out for a visit.”

Spencer smiled weakly, and he couldn’t deny he liked the sound of Sam’s idea. “Maybe? I think she would be willing to do that, if she can get away from the job.”

“She would definitely be willing to do that.” Sam stood up and moved back to his end of the couch, sitting down. “We’ll make it happen.”

Spencer wiped his eyes and took another deep breath, looking at Sam. “I should visit JJ, too. I used to see Henry and Michael all the time. They probably wonder what happened to me.”

“One of us could come with you,” Sam suggested. “Or both of us.”

Spencer immediately shook his head. “You and Dean were both on the FBI’s Most Wanted list before you were considered dead. If you come to visit the members of my team, we run the risk of them recognizing you.”

Sam conceded with a nod of his head. “Yeah, that’s a good point. But we’ve still got the Garcia plan, and if you go to visit JJ, you know Dean and I will be waiting back at the Bunker for you.”

Spencer looked down at the hands resting in his lap, and then he looked up at Sam again. “Are you really sure you won’t mind me staying with you guys?”

“Spencer.” Sam let out an incredulous laugh. “You. Are. Our. Friend.” He shook his head, his expression baffled. “We’re crazy about you, Spence. We’d love to have you stay with us.”

Spencer bit his lip. “I know that, I think. I just…” He shook his head. “I just need time to drill it into my thick skull.”

Sam opened his mouth to reply, but he was cut off by the front door swinging open and Dean calling out, “Well!” He walked into the library, wiping his hands on a greasy shop rag. “Teaching a demon how to do an oil change is something I never thought I would find on my agenda, but here we are.”

Spencer gave Dean a hopeful thumbs up. “Success?”

Xal appeared from behind Dean and gave Spencer a more confident thumbs up. “Success.”

Sam looked at Dean with an exasperated expression. “Can you please tell Spencer we would be happy to let him stay with us at the Bunker?”

Dean spread his arms and looked at Spencer incredulously. “You need to be told that?” He threw the greasy rag at Spencer’s face. “Doofus. Of course you can stay in the Bunker.”

Spencer pulled the rag off his head and gave Dean a withering glare. “Yes. I have been reliably informed.” He threw the rag back at Dean. “It’s just taking me a little while to wrap my head around it.”

Dean caught the rag and shoved part of it into his pocket. “Well, put that magnificent brain of yours to work and get to believing us.”

Xal hooked his thumbs in his pockets and rocked on his heels. “I know I’m just an information source, but you’re always welcome to chill with me. You’re actually pretty cool.”

Spencer snorted out a laugh and smiled a little. “Thanks, I think.”

Xal shrugged. “Eh. Giving you compliments is what I live for.”

Dean gestured vaguely to the room. “Where’s Bobby?”

Bobby rolled in from the kitchen with a glass of water. “I was hiding from the emotional conflict.” He looked at Spencer then. “You ever get tired of being with them at the Bunker, you come here to me. You’re always welcome, boy.”

Spencer smiled and gestured to the glass in Bobby’s hand. “You could have gotten a beer.”

Bobby sipped his water and shook his head. “Nah. Not with you going through withdrawals. I don’t want you having any temptation.”

Spencer gave a sheepish smile, fingers twisting through the fabric of his blanket. “Thanks. I appreciate it.”

“It’s not a problem,” Bobby assured.

“Speaking of withdrawals,” Dean started, planting his hands on his hips. “How are you feeling?”

Spencer shrugged his shoulders. “My stomach still hurts, I’m achy, and my arms won’t stop shaking.” He shrugged again. “It could be worse.”

“You feelin’ up to cards, boy?” Bobby jerked a thumb over his shoulder, indicating the kitchen. “It’s about time I teach you some Bolivian Canasta.”

Spencer blinked in surprise. “I’ve never heard of that.” But he loved cards.

“It’s a four-player game,” Bobby explained, looking at Xal.

Xal held up his hands in a gesture of surrender. “I’ll head out. I wouldn’t want to overstay my welcome.” Just like that, Xal was gone.

Bobby looked back at Spencer. “You feelin’ up to it?”

Spencer smiled and nodded. “Yeah, I’d love to play.”

Bobby backed up his wheelchair, turning toward the kitchen table. “Alright, boys, get out here.”

Sam immediately put his hand up. “I call being Spencer’s partner!”

Dean scoffed. “Psh. You can have the genius. Bobby and I are gonna kick butt and take names.”

Spencer smiled, and despite the lingering symptoms of withdrawal and his own nervous brain, he found he was happy. He was going to play cards with his friends—no, with his family—and he wasn’t going to be alone. For the first time in a long time, things were looking up.

And Spencer was happy.

* * *

_"We're all together, harmony will abound;_

_Look at each other, all that was lost is found._

_New situation if our direction's true_ ;

_We're all together, everyone is me and you."_

_\- No One Together, Kansas_


End file.
